Since I started working for the Florida holiday website, I've been tortured by repetitive nightmares. I'm chased by night by the spirits of the hotel rooms.
There was a time when I was traveling a lot on the business. Fortunately, hotels are no longer hoping. But at night I sailed in a hotel room away in time …
The day was over, I called home to check the kids. It seemed like there was a shouting match in my absence. It sounded like she won Pandemonium, but Total Bedlam made some noise. "Can you just shut up a minute," I said in the phone.
"Stop," I heard the man in the next room twirled.
I chose to ignore it. "Come on guys, can not you stop fighting for a minute?"
"I'll show you what fighting means," I heard through the wall.
"I can not even think here," I complained in the phone.
"Hey, I've had almost enough of you," shouted the man on the other side of the wall.
Suddenly I was scared a lot. I imagined a heavy, two kilometer two bum, breaking a fist through the wall. I shut the phone and wondered how thin the walls were.
Nothing happened. No fist. No crushed wall. No breasts, six kilometers of two weights.
I decided to go down for relaxing stress. As I closed the door, the man from the next room appeared.
Fortunately he was not lifting weight.
I wanted to ask him why he had called me through the wall while I was trying to discipline my kids when he called, "Hey?"
Suddenly I knew how thin the walls were.
I actually found the hotel walls with two thick walls:
If you're lucky, you get "cut down on your TV". walls. If you are less happy, you get "reduce the brightness of your TV!" walls.
Fortunately, the hotel rooms are impeccably clean. It's true. The sign says so. Only until you look under the mattress to find a copy of 1976 Businessweek magazine and theater tickets for The Music Man in 1982.
I do not know why hotels pretend to be so spotless. All these junk under the bed can be used as a marketing tool. – Stay in Hilton Hilton and join our hunting mattress.
If hotels are not caught, sooner or later, requests will do so. They can turn everything into a sales pitch. For example, "Color Television" (Ooooooohh.). And "Outdoor pool" (I think the "outside" function is a nice added touch, right?) And what about "free parking" (which is really a way to say, "You do not have to park your car in your room." ).
What worries me most about hotels is what they keep in the drawers. Have you ever seen that there is always a bible in the drawer? Why?
When you buy a car, there is no Bible in the glove compartment, although the road is where you most need prayers.
When you dig for the reward at the bottom of the Cracker Jack box, it's never a bible.
Even in hospitals, where prayer can be everything you left, there is no Bible in the drawer.
Only in hotels and in death sentences libraries come as standard equipment.
And why just the Bible? I had enough free time to search for the fertilizer and the Koran in the hotel rooms, and I never found anything. Jews and Muslims do not stay in hotels? What do they know I do not?
Fortunately, I no longer have to go to hotels. I do not have to finish a shadow-puppet theater from a man on the other side of the wall. You do not have to read over his shoulder. I do not worry about what she ate for dinner.
I do not have to listen to his snoring. I can enjoy my own nights in peace.